The Stinky Milk Horror: Doth Breathe Forth (the Odor)

by illimitableoceanofinexplicability

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When I was a child the milk seemed always on the verge of turning. The expiration date rushing nearer every minute, its wholesome goodness in a state of free fall that could only be saved from wretched ruin with the complete consumption of every last drop. This we did dutifully, my brother and I, always as we were under the ever  present watching of Mom who, even to this day (in her elderly but no less formidable form), is known to utter in the dark early morning hours, “Have some milk”, and then wander off to vacuum some rarely used area of the house, though sure to return for checking that we had done as she instructed, or else. Yes, ‘or else’ which as you know is meant to introduce the second of two alternatives. In this case the second alternative being a punishment for not drinking our milk that I would not (for the sake of those unprepared emotionally), and indeed cannot mention here. For whatever the second alternative was to be my brother and I never chanced to discover as our fear had been well enough guided and so deeply imbedded that the frighteningly vague implications of ‘or else’ was always enough to prompt us into doing as we were told.

Ah, but enough of my child hood suffering! No doubt you faced hardships as a child yourself and are right now guffawing at my pathetic tale wounded still, as you obviously are, by whatever wrongs were inflicted upon you by those well meaning, if inadequately trained, adults that you were, without even an ‘or else’, condemned to cohabitation with. Let us now, for at least a brief moment, put aside our own personal tales of woe and instead enjoy the words below that did come to me while I waited for an endless train to pass me by on the way to purchase milk at the market.

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stench

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 Not yet quite turned

though still stench filled

the milk described as stinky

its cardboard carton mouth

when opened wide

doth breathe forth

the odor of our impending doom

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* Fun Activity

Try saying ‘doth breathe forth’ five times fast. Maybe you can do it. I admit I found it a little difficult.

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